Dating Site Mail

Yes, I’m back on dating sites, so prepare for some humor.  Such as these first contacts from the site mail (unedited).  I did not respond to any of them, but for your entertainment, here is what I might have said if I had (in bold violet text).

  • Hello your very sexy
    You’re very bad with understanding the difference between “your” (indicating ownership) and “you’re” (contraction for you are).
  • Hi angel,feel like getting to know you
    I’m sorry, you must be messaging the wrong girl.  #1 – my name is not Angel.  #2 – I don’t believe in angels because I’m an atheist.
  • You have got a wonderful breath taken smile on your profile picture .. tell me how old is it and where was it taken ? hope you are having a wonderful day ?
    Ummm, you mean breath taking – perhaps?  And why do you want to know how old it is?  Are you doing a bad job of casually checking to see if I’ve posted an old picture?  And why do you want to know where it was taken?  Are you going to stalk me?
  • Hey
    I got nothing.
  • Feeling frisky today?
    Well if I were, I wouldn’t share that info with a stranger from a dating site.
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